Cross Over Coaches

[Saugussoftball 0]

Hi all,

I am truly beside myself. My daughter is on a "select" soccer team and was coached (by me) to a championship softball team. In her second season of basketballl she happened to land on the last place team. Her Select team soccer coach has the third place team, out of 12 teams. Tonight we played her team and in the 3rd period were getting slaughtered. As a coach, I would have pulled my "starters" and played the "bench", but this coach chose to keep the starters in and they annialated "our" team. Needless to say, I was insenced. This soccer coach has always preached NO HUMILIATION. Tonight I saw another side of her and am very angry. She totally demoralized the last place team and "T-ed' off my daughter in so much that she doesn't want to finish the soccer season (with a definate run for the state title) this spring. I am angry and tend to agree with my daughter in that she not play for the title, but I also feel that she made a commitment to her team and should finish out the season..........she will NOT play another season for this woman in the fall soccer league. My daughter is one of the "key" players on this select team and I am so conflicted. Please help.

[kjtvc 0]

There's no accounting for some coaches' actions. There was a similar game in our league where the first place team was winning 30-4 or something like that, and the winning coach kept his starters in, even as HIS OWN TEAM'S PARENTS yelled from the sidelines to put his other girls in the game. It happens. It shouldn't, of course, but it happens.

The team he was playing spread his playing time out evenly (not that it would affect the game), simply because that's his approach to the game. He taught his girls one thing, and the other coach taught his girls something else. But both girls learned from the other coaches, too, whether they realized it or not.

My own daughter played for a screamer coach for a year, and then she quit. He is a successful coach, and he's had teams play in Orlando for the AAU championships a couple times, but my daughter didn't value playing for a winning team over enjoying playing. She now plays for a parish team at a much lower level. Most of her former teammates still play for the screamer. Most of her new teammates cannot even make a proper layup. My daughter doesn't care. She enjoys playing with them. Everyone has to make their own choices.

Your daughter has to decide what is important to her: enjoying the game, competition, winning, loyalty to you and your team, facing reality (meaning there are coaches like this, and she'll grin and bear it), etc. For some, the decision is easy. For others, it's not an easy call. Good luck.

Kenny

[Saugussoftball 0]

This is so hard for both of us. She has been on this team, chosen from a tryout of 200 girls, for 4 years. There are no other teams she would be happy on. This coach requires that all the players also play an indoor winter league, which my daughter and a couple of other girls refused to do. There may, and I hope this is not true, be a bit of retaliation for this. The long and short of it is, this morning my daughter said she will give up soccer all together and play field hockey. This is a girl who lived and breathed socccer, went to a lot of the WUSA games (Go Breakers!) held up Michelle Akers and Mia Hamm as heros, and now I see her losing her dream. All because of a coach. Why can't people see what they do to kids all for the sake of a win?