7 replies to this topic

[Johnp2]

First, I really believe my team has some of the best parents a coach could ask for. They are ALL really great folks, whom I am starting to build some great relationships with.

One of the things that has raised my eye a little this season, however, is that we have a few players who have not been showing up to practice on a regular basis. In the past (Soccer), I was not much of a stickler for practice---we had one player last year that did not make it to a single practice.

However, I let the parents know this season that football is much different. You can't just put the kids on the field and tell them to "go!". Consequently, we had an interesting time negotiating practice days/times in our kick-off meeting. One parent could not make it ANY night M-F. (She eventually dropped her son out of football due to overcommitment).

One reason we have three practices per week is because not every parent could make it on the same night. This makes it easy for those that cannot make one or two of the practices, at least their child get's ONE practice per week. Thus we have yet to have a single practice where all players are there. We have 12 players, and on average we have 8-11 players in attendance. The second reason we have three practices is for obvious preparation. The kids have a blast at practice, and a lot of the parents do too. It allows us to do more than just focus on "plays", as we can perform more drills/games/strategy/team-building, etc. I know I am doing the right things when I hear a collective, "Awwwww" from the kids when I tell them practice is over.

Some parents on my team would bring their kids to practice if I held it every night (which I am about to start a 4th practice for those that want to show up).

However, I think the fact that because some parents know this they feel "Johnny can miss tonight and Wed. because we still have a practice on Friday"---which really was not my intent. My intent was--if you can make it to the "normal" practice times, please do so.

It is a little frustrating to hear a parent say, "Jason has baseball practice tonight, so he will be at practice tomorrow". I try not to take it as baseball is more important, but I simply don't know why parents sign their kids up for so many things at once and expect all the stars to align in their favor with respect to practice.

So what is the answer? Well, my only other choice was to say, "We are having practice once a week---and you must show up." This might force some to come to football over baseball, but then there are some that simply cannot make it (due to work or something) on that night, it was set a negative tone from the onset, we would only get one night of practice per week, etc.

Or, I would say, "If your child does not make it to practice, he will not play."

My league DOES support "No Practice/No Play", but I do NOT adhere to that. I will admit giving the kids who show up to practice more plays in a game, simply because they know what they are doing.

We've had maybe 20 practices thus far this season, and one player (who is actually one of the best athletes on the team) has only made two practices. In our last game, I had to get with him right before the game and give him the five minute drill on what his assignments will are for the game. I know we would have a better chance of winning if I gave him more plays, but instead finding myself calling the play of a 6-year old who has attended every practice and worked his tail off, as I owe it to him AND his parents instead of focusing soley on winning. His mother did let me know up front that he would be missing a lot of practices (due to him playing other sports), and was quite contrite, even offering to "step down", however I urged her to not quit, letting her know I would be as flexible as possible as I know her son really wants to play football. The fact I was told up front is fine, as I KNOW not to expect him at many practices.

Sorry if I seem like I'm ranting here. I'm sure others struggle with this as well. I understand that parents are busy (I am one of them), but when we sign our kids up for something, we do so with a flexible schedule, else we would not commit. I also know not to expect every parent at ever practice (which in all my years of coaching I don't think has ever happened). However, the fact I go overboard into a) Being flexible, and Ensuring that the kids have the times of their life at practice, I just wish we had a little better attendance.

Thanks

[rushbuster70]

I'm all about al the kids being at practice.I only have 2 practices a week for 1.5 hours for each practice.I stress to parents if they aren't going to be there to let me know.I also let them know it may impact the players amount of time they play in the game.I'm all for the no practice/no play because its the right thing to do...I mean theres always the kid who works his tail off but isnt as talented as a kid that doesnt always come to practice.So reward the ones who are there.I cant wait to finally get into competitive football where if a kid doesnt come he wont play.The ones that dont come we dont start them regardless of how good they are.Its the right thing to do for the ones who are there putting in the time and working hard.I hate not having everyone at practice.Its frustrating as a coach.You cant just throw a kid in the game and expect him to play good.Parents dont realize that.Then it comes into play that they dont learn everything but they want there kid to play QB.Never will happen on my team.I always talk to the QB's parents and let them know he's a captain and the team needs to be able to count on him.

[Coach Rob]

Since we play flag football through I-9, the practice and game happen back to back always on Sunday afternoons. If the game is at 2:00pm, the practice is at 1:00pm the same day. Personally, I like the concept because you knock out the football deal in one day, so if kids happen to play other sports (we have a few who do), this allows them to do so.

In other sports, soccer and basketball, I've run into kids who don't show, but for the most part I had good turnouts. One thing I did do is the kids who missed practice never started, they always had to wait until the other kids played first.

CRob

[Vegas Coach]

First, I really believe my team has some of the best parents a coach could ask for. They are ALL really great folks, whom I am starting to build some great relationships with.

One of the things that has raised my eye a little this season, however, is that we have a few players who have not been showing up to practice on a regular basis. In the past (Soccer), I was not much of a stickler for practice---we had one player last year that did not make it to a single practice.

However, I let the parents know this season that football is much different. You can't just put the kids on the field and tell them to "go!". Consequently, we had an interesting time negotiating practice days/times in our kick-off meeting. One parent could not make it ANY night M-F. (She eventually dropped her son out of football due to overcommitment).

One reason we have three practices per week is because not every parent could make it on the same night. This makes it easy for those that cannot make one or two of the practices, at least their child get's ONE practice per week. Thus we have yet to have a single practice where all players are there. We have 12 players, and on average we have 8-11 players in attendance. The second reason we have three practices is for obvious preparation. The kids have a blast at practice, and a lot of the parents do too. It allows us to do more than just focus on "plays", as we can perform more drills/games/strategy/team-building, etc. I know I am doing the right things when I hear a collective, "Awwwww" from the kids when I tell them practice is over.

Some parents on my team would bring their kids to practice if I held it every night (which I am about to start a 4th practice for those that want to show up).

However, I think the fact that because some parents know this they feel "Johnny can miss tonight and Wed. because we still have a practice on Friday"---which really was not my intent. My intent was--if you can make it to the "normal" practice times, please do so.

It is a little frustrating to hear a parent say, "Jason has baseball practice tonight, so he will be at practice tomorrow". I try not to take it as baseball is more important, but I simply don't know why parents sign their kids up for so many things at once and expect all the stars to align in their favor with respect to practice.

So what is the answer? Well, my only other choice was to say, "We are having practice once a week---and you must show up." This might force some to come to football over baseball, but then there are some that simply cannot make it (due to work or something) on that night, it was set a negative tone from the onset, we would only get one night of practice per week, etc.

Or, I would say, "If your child does not make it to practice, he will not play."

My league DOES support "No Practice/No Play", but I do NOT adhere to that. I will admit giving the kids who show up to practice more plays in a game, simply because they know what they are doing.

We've had maybe 20 practices thus far this season, and one player (who is actually one of the best athletes on the team) has only made two practices. In our last game, I had to get with him right before the game and give him the five minute drill on what his assignments will are for the game. I know we would have a better chance of winning if I gave him more plays, but instead finding myself calling the play of a 6-year old who has attended every practice and worked his tail off, as I owe it to him AND his parents instead of focusing soley on winning. His mother did let me know up front that he would be missing a lot of practices (due to him playing other sports), and was quite contrite, even offering to "step down", however I urged her to not quit, letting her know I would be as flexible as possible as I know her son really wants to play football. The fact I was told up front is fine, as I KNOW not to expect him at many practices.

Sorry if I seem like I'm ranting here. I'm sure others struggle with this as well. I understand that parents are busy (I am one of them), but when we sign our kids up for something, we do so with a flexible schedule, else we would not commit. I also know not to expect every parent at ever practice (which in all my years of coaching I don't think has ever happened). However, the fact I go overboard into a) Being flexible, and Ensuring that the kids have the times of their life at practice, I just wish we had a little better attendance.

Thanks

I feel your pain in alot of what you wrote. We are only allowed to practice 2 times MAX in a week during the season, so I ran 2 practices about 1.25-1.5 hours long. We play 5-5, so I had 10 kids on the team. I could count on 1 hand the amount of times we actually had all 10 players there at once. The practices went great when we did. Usually the turn out was on average 8 players. I also try and stress the importance of practice, especially with football and I know practice time is very very key to getting reps in.

I had a situation just like yours on my team where one of my best "athletes" and best players on the team missed about 75% of the practices and a couple games sprinkled in as well. Now before the season the parents were up front and told me he would miss sometimes because he played on a year round travel soccer team and basically that took priority. I was okay letting him play, because mom and dad also stressed how much he wanted to play football too and they said they would understand if he didnt get much playing time due to missed practices. Well, this kid was one of my top 3 players and had he been able to make every practice he could have easily been the best. Problem was he was lost on alot of our plays, route running and zone assignments. However, he had the best hands as he would almost catch everything and once he had the ball, that soccer like agility showed as he could take it to the house any play. Problem was lack of practices and reps.

I continued to play every kid every game despite practice reps. All kids got the same amount of playing time pretty much, even the kid who missed many practices. However this fall I am going to be a little more assertive with the parents about the importance for their kids making it. I also dont understand why parents would try and sign their kids up for so many activities all at once. My son does one activity at a time and thats it. Right now hes playing soccer and loving it! Heck, one of my sons good friends parents have their son in an activity/sport every night of the week plus games on weekends!! When we as parents put our children in sports on a team, we have to make sure we also teach and set a good example for our kids that being on a team is a commitment which means making it to practices/games, having fun and giving 100% effort is key! My son (and most kids I suspect) have the most fun at practices...... in my opinion, especially at younger ages, practice is really what I sign my kid up for in a given sport. Sure the games are fun for that 40 minutes once a week, however those 2 practices a week is where my son is having all his fun and where he is learning!!!

[Orange]

You know, when I saw that you have practice three times a week I was surprised. In my opinion that is way too much of a commitment for any sport at that age. On top of that you have a game and now the kids life it totally about flag football. I'm not surprised that kids miss practice. If I were signing my son up to play and I found out that practice was three times a week, first of all I wouldn't do it. And if I did I'd probably only have him go once or twice and other things would take priority when they came up. AND I'm really into flag football too! It's just that it's too much. I believe that you would be better served by having one or two practices per week and being more strict about attendance. We had 11 kids on our team and practice one day a week. Typically I'd have all 11 or maybe 1-2 would miss but usually not. I would always have the team show up 30 minutes before the game and squeeze in another quick practice/ warm up. I'd send out an email each week asking who was going to miss practice or the game. I always got responses. If someone missed then I'd give them less playing time.

I honestly think you can get done in one practice what you need to do. Get an assistant or two and make your practice time really efficient. Maybe compromise and cut down to 2 practices for now. Just some suggestions.

[Johnp2]

You know, when I saw that you have practice three times a week I was surprised. In my opinion that is way too much of a commitment for any sport at that age. On top of that you have a game and now the kids life it totally about flag football. I'm not surprised that kids miss practice.

I apologize as perhaps I was not as clear as I could have been.

The reason I have three practices is because it was impossible to find a single night where all parents could show up. My only other choice was to then take the easy way out and be "firm", sticking to a single day, knowing that one or more players would be excluded and never be able to attend a practice. There is no way I would go for that, as I feel I owe it to the families as the coach to be as flexible as possible. Funny as the mindset which dictates, "The good thing about being the coach is you can pick when you want to have practice" (which my sports director once told me) is a misnomer. I guess the coach could, but that would go against my philosophy, which is to SERVE my team and ensure I do everything I can to see that they have an enjoyable season.

My initial plan was to have two practices per week to meet everyone's schedule, AND because I feel two practices is needed per week to properly teach the kids about football, which is my # 1 goal as coach. I personally do not think that is causing the "kids life to be totally about flag football", as three hours a week (game included) does not constitute the make-up of one's life.

Adding the third practice was actually some of the parentss idea. A lot of them--who could only make one of the two (original) practice nights--inquired about the feasibility of adding a third practice. They felt comfortable approaching me as they know how much I enjoy it--as do their kids--and wanted their child to get their money's worth out of signing up their child for football. I obliged--and have no regrets.

Regarding getting as much done in one practice by being "efficient", while we do our best to be efficient, we also are also at practice to have fun, and not to be hurried. As mentioned, this allows us to perform more team-building, take the time to discuss WHY we are doing certain things, teach every player how his role is important on each and every play, conduct our Player of the Week ceremony, take water breaks, etc. etc.

Consequently, my post was not necessarily an attempt to inquire about what you feel I am doing incorrectly, as I am confident in my decisions and feel my track record speaks for itself. Instead, I was wanting to know if other coaches have dealt with players whose parents have overcommited them, and how the coach has handled such situations.

[HornFan]

I'm pretty sure in the league I'm in we're only allowed one practice per week. I wish we could do more, I'll have to confirm that for next year.

[Orange]

Consequently, my post was not necessarily an attempt to inquire about what you feel I am doing incorrectly, as I am confident in my decisions and feel my track record speaks for itself. Instead, I was wanting to know if other coaches have dealt with players whose parents have overcommited them, and how the coach has handled such situations.

My reply was not meant to judge whether or not your 3x per week practice was the right thing to do. You were asking about kids who are missing practice and why. In my opinion with that many practices, they are missing because football itself is becoming too much. The parents are probably feeling like any given practice is not important as there are many of them to attend.

With regard to what I did: Before the season began I chose two days and emailed every parent asking them which day was best and if either was not possible. My first choice was Wednesday and my second choice was Tuesday. I made it clear that they would have to make most of the practices or chose another team. One kid absolutely could not make it on Wednesday. One said they absolutely could not make it on Tuesday. For me it was an easy choice since the one with the Wednesday conflict was one of my assistants. I told everyone Tuesday was going to be the day and somehow the one with the Tuesday conflict changed their schedule so they all could make it. I was going with Tuesday even if that meant someone had to drop off the team, fortunately it worked out for them.

I have my own personal philosophy for my children, only one sport allowed at a time. I have seen other kids do 2 or more sports simultaneously. When that happens usually someone gets the short end of the stick. One of my players was playing soccer and basketball and half my team was playing basketball. Our morning games were fine but when we had an afternoon game some of them would be so tired it would effect their play. It bothered me but what could I do? The soccer kid has a great motor but he was the best player on his team and subsequently played the entire time running all over the place. He was spent when he'd show up after a game. There is really not much you can do as a coach except understand there will be limitations with these kids.